One Year

I knew without a doubt that I HAD to be

with Travis on the one year annivesary of

his wreck.  I was the first one to get to

him that horrific day one year ago

and I just had to be with him again.........

thankfully to celebrate this time!:)

I will never my whole entire life get

over what has happened to my beloved

Travis.  There is not a morning that

I don't wake up and wish it weren't so

and there's not one single night this last

year that I haven't laid my head down

and wished it all away.  There have also

been very few days this last year that I haven't

shed tears for Travis (mostly), for my sister,

for my parents, for our entire family,

and for myself.  Not pity party type

tears...just broken heart tears.

I.hate.what.happened.

On the same note, there have been

very VERY few days (shamefully I can't say

everyday because some days I question

it all and just don't want to accept it)

 that I haven't thanked God with all of my

heart for saving Travis and showing me

first hand the Goodness that exists

in this world and that He really can

and does perform miracles.

God is so present.............

so ever, ever present

and He holds my every last tear

and comforts me even in the depths

of my 'why's?' and doubts.

God is Good.

It worked out so perfectly because

Troy and Walker wanted to go to the

Ranger game on the 25th so they

dropped me off at CNS before

they headed to the game.

Haddie and Hudson stayed with my

mother and Aunt Michelle so

I could have Travis all to myself for once:)!

The guys dropped me off before

the bus had brought Travis back

from the clinic.  So, I asked the driver

if I could ride with him back to the

clinic to get my Superman. 

I was absolutely giddy riding over

to get that boy!!!  He was expecting

me to be waiting at his 'apartment' for him.

I knew he would be so shocked

when I hopped off the bus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the way there I got a text from him

asking if he should "warn CNS" meaning

let them know the STORM had arrived;)

I had already told Travis that I wasn't bringing

the kids this time, but he had forgotten.

He was REALLY excited and surprised

when I jumped off the bus,

but also REALLY disappointed

that the STORM wasn't with me!!!:(

Linda, his resident assistant, was so

bummed, too!  They were funny!!!

I hate, absolutely HATE

the fact that Travis has to

be loaded up on and chained into a bus

to ride anywhere.  HATE it...

but while riding on the bus with him,

I was again reminded how GRATEFUL

I am that Travis IS where he IS today.

One year ago, I would never have

dreamed that he would be sitting up

in a wheel chair and texting me how

disappointed he was that Walker,

Hadlee AND especially Hudson (who I

thought he'd never know) weren't there with us!

We got back to his place and got all situated.

He told me to pick a movie and I picked

"Friends"...I figured we would watch movies

all night.  I noticed that he had his head in

his phone texting someone for the longest time

and I even gave him a hard time about it.

All of the sudden, my phone beeped letting me

know I had a text.  The tears welled up in my eyes

as I read my text

 FROM TRAVIS...

That sweet boy was letting me know

that he was glad it was "just us"!!!

Thank you, Sweet Jesus, for

 the miracle of Travis. 

Thank you with ALL of my heart & soul.

From that text on, we spent the rest of the

night with my chair scooted up next to

him "talking" and laughing non-stop!

Scott's brother, Stewart, and his precious

family also came to visit for a little bit.  :)

Linda, our FAVORITE, resident assistant

happened to be working that night.

She is like family and I really think

she just might be an angel. 

She and Travis have the sweetest

relationship...I swear they just "get" each other.

She is an answer to prayer and I have

no doubts about Travis when she

is with him.  They are hilarious together!

Linda was able to ask me lots of

questions about Travis and what he was

like before the accident and I was

able to learn about what a caring

and spiritual and amazing heart she has.

Travis and I had some really deep talks that

night and I even talked him into rekindling

a friendship with Alyssa whom he thought

had broken his heart.  I finally got it through

him that he was confused from his injury

and that she really hadn't ever broken his heart.

Tears rolled down Linda's face and mine

when Travis texted Alyssa for the first

time in MONTHS!!! 

We talked about the day of the accident,

what he remembers, and laughed A LOT

about the Storm!  He had me write on

his Facebook for him and I thought it

so sweet that he wanted to write on

Cody's wall on this particular day.

Cody was the driver of the car...

Travis wanted to let him know how much

he loves his buddy ~ even on this day

one year later.  That's our

Superman's heart.  I also got

to show him and read to him

MANY of the notes that people

had sent for his one year

Miracle-Versary book!!!!!!!!

I took pictures of a lot of the pages...
I'm mainly posting the ones that came from
my dear sweet friends.  There are some
that came in after this day, so I haven't
taken pictures of those yet.
EVERY single note, card, letter, e-mail
was ABSOLUTELY PERFECT:)

This card was from my parents

(mother changed the "I" to "We")

and when you opened it, the song

"Say a little prayer for you"

played!!!!!  LOVED it:)))

The following three are from three

little lives who are hopefully changed

forever, for the better from all of this...

The Reeds...simply amazing.

So faithful.  So supportive...

Again, simply amazing!

Trav's middle school principal

sent such a sweet card.
She fell in the cafeteria when Travis was in
8th grade...he was the only person

who went to help her.

Also...a card and pictures from

a sweet mommy of a little girl

in Walker's second grade class. 
A new, dear friend from this.

My high school friends,

South Bosque PTA friends...

God's goodness ABOUNDS.

God love the Hoodies!!!!!!!!!
They gotta be the best people on earth!

Supporters from Australia...

and not just my Kimberly Mo.  WOW!
This friend of Kimberly's wrote in her
card that she had not believed in the
power of prayer until this. 

Amazing college friends,

Even Robin's dear friend from Arkansas...

Walker's high school principal.

She knew there was something special

about Travis when he was at MHS:)

A card and sweet pictures from my

college dorm & first apartment roommate.

Truly a FAITHFUL and real friend.

So many sweet little lives

have learned the power of prayer

through this. 

Kimberly from Down Under;)

She knows my heart.

She has my heart.

The amazing, incredible Beth...

my blogger friend who has taken in

my entire family.  Her kindness, her faithfulness,

her generosity, her compassion...

all to a family whom she has never

even met in person. 

There were so many more that I could

share...like Kelli Kelly's and the California

Contingency;) I will take more pics

to share next time I'm with Travis.

I am BEYOND grateful to all of those

who took the time to write Travis...

I absolutely LOVED reading them to him

and he loved it, too.

I kept asking him if he wanted me to

keep going, and I always got a thumbs up!:)

Very late that night, the boys came back

to get me.  Trav's nurse had waited on

giving him his night time meds that

immediately put him to sleep so he

could see Troy & Walker. 

Of course they had put in that request!!!;)

As usual it was SO HARD to leave him:(((

BUT much, MUCH easier than

what it was like one year ago...

 Not able to touch him, hug him,

see his eyes open....and not knowing

if I EVER would again.  :(

MORE thankful for ONE year going by

then any person could possibly be. 

A miracle STILL in the making!.

God is Good.

 I will never, EVER doubt that. 

"He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed,

miracles that cannot be counted."

Job 9:10

I wrote about the ONE year annivesary

on Trav's Caringbridge for July 25th...

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/travisbigham/journal

And celebrated the actual one year

with this entry on my blog.