In An Instant.....

I cringe thinking about Sunday morning,

July 25th. We had just woken up, the kids

were playing, I had just put my contacts in

and the phone rang. I saw "Hillcrest Hospital"

on the caller ID and thought it weird that

I was getting an appointment reminder

on an early Sunday morning.

How I wish it had just been that.

Oh, how I wish.

On the phone was a chaplain asking me

if I was a relative of Travis Bigham?

My heart sank. Literally sank.

She proceeded to tell me that they

needed a family member at the hospital

as soon as possible.

While I was on the phone, Troy mouthed to me,

"TRAVIS"...I hadn't even said his name yet,

but Troy knew. He had only heard my

panic and my cries.

I knew Lynna was way off

camping without cell phone coverage.

I figured my mother was in church.

All the sweet chaplain would tell me

was that it was very serious and could

I get there quickly. I threw my clothes

on and remember looking back as I

raced out the door at my three

babies' faces playing in the living room.

Walker had such a look of fear. :(

In an instant, life can change.

I called Michelle on the way and calmly told her

what was going on, I repeatedly tried my

dad but he wasn't waking up and my mother

had already left for church so her phone was off.

I left a desperate message for my

Aunt Kitty & Uncle Ron to help me.

I called my dear friend Robin. I knew she would

take charge and get the prayers going.

Thank God she did.

Once I finally found the Surgical ICU Trauma

Center in our new hospital,

(I went in through the ER and had to sprint

across the entire hospital!)

I was met by a very nice nurse who

put her arms around me and led me

to a room. I had no idea that Travis

would be laying there.

Tubes, machines, beeps, monitors...

it was all too overwhelming.

I hit the floor.

I could not believe my sweet, handsome,

fun-loving nephew was right there.

I tried to speak to him.

I was in TOTAL SHOCK.

My first baby laying there like that?

My heart broke on so many levels...

for the obvious reason and also that

Lynna and Scott weren't there.

I needed Troy, too. :(

Michelle, Macy, Logan and Terry

came in not far behind me.

We couldn't grasp what to do.

I couldn't even locate Scott's number.

Michelle mentioned to me that Robin

was standing down the hall.

For the second time in my life, she

appeared to me like an angel.

She came in, spoke soundly with

the nurses, and led us in prayer

over Travis. Oh God, our hearts were so heavy.

Thank you, Sweet Jesus, for already being there.

Travis was in VERY grave condition.

Organ donors had already been contacted.

His brain was severely swollen, his

Intercrainial Pressure numbers were

way above 60. He had a drain coming from

his brain. He wasn't breathing on his own.

He was in a self induced coma.

He barely had any scratches AT ALL.

I swear he looked like a soap opera star

in a hospital scene. We touched him,

spoke softly to him, and
PRAYED OUR HEARTS OUT

that he would survive.

Michelle and I bonded as only

sisters could especially since the one

sister who desperately needed to be there

wasn't. It was all so gut-wrenching.

Terry, Macy, & Logan went to

find my mother in Sunday School.

Troy's mom came to my house to keep the kids

so Troy could go and wake my dad

and get both of them to the hospital.

My Aunt Kitty, Uncle Ron and Mical arrived.

They let us all be in the room with Travis.

I asked later on in the week why they

had been so lenient letting us in the room

that first day and then so strict later?

The nurse told me that they never believed he

would make it through that day so

they wanted us to be with him.

Thank you, Sweet Jesus.

We were desperate in our anguish

over Travis PLUS desperate to locate

his mother and dad.

I finally thought to give the chaplain

Scott's parents' names in Belton

and she was able to reach Scott.

He then still had an hour drive to get to Waco.

I knew Lynna was at Garner State Park.

The hospital sent Park Rangers to locate her,

Calvin and Hunter but to no avail.

Once my poor mother arrived, she was able

to tell Troy where she had written down

the actual park's name on her night stand.

They were actually next to Garner State Park.

Park Rangers delivered a note to Lynna

telling her to call Hillcrest Hospital.

Could you even imagine?

She thought it was for my dad.

After the chaplain spoke with Lynna,

she asked the nurse to hand the phone to me and

I told her that I would not leave Travis.

I reminded her that I was the closest thing

to her for Travis and I'd be there for him.

As would my mother and Michelle.

He had us all.

But I knew that Travis IS Lynna's heart.

She had absolutely no idea the seriousness

of everything. And she still had a

FIVE hour drive to get back that ended up taking

even longer due to their tires blowing out.

While I couldn't understand that at the

time, maybe God was protecting her

from what we saw that day.

Trav's body was doing some awful things

that day that no mother should have to witness.

His life was as fragile as it could possibly be.

We never left the hospital.

I was sick over the fact that Travis

had been alone (without family actually...

the officers never left until they got a hold of me).

I told the nurses when I arrived

that we had a huge, supportive family

and that it was crazy they couldn't find

us that morning. A couple of days later, that

same nurse told me that I sure wasn't

kidding about our big, supportive family!!! ;)

One of the trauma doctors that morning

even before Scott got there

asked for me & my parents to

come into a small room so he could talk

with us. I now laugh thinking back...

there were at least ten of us

who followed him in there!

We were literally given NO HOPE.

Not because the doctors were

being mean, but because that

was the situation. It.was.AWFUL.

The doctors and staff repeatedly told

us we were in a minute by minute situation.

We were told if he did somehow survive,

that he would be in a vegetative state.

Scott arrived and leaned over

Travis, and said, "Travis, it's your Dad.

I'm here." I swear Travis heard him

because he moved.

The nurses and doctors told us that

couldn't have been the case, that he

was only having reflexes. I think differently.

He had felt his Dad's strength.

Troy went and got Hudson so I could nurse

him. He was our bright little spot

at the hospital. The Reeds took

Walker and Hadlee and spoiled them rotten!

I had Robin to call Kelli G and I texted

Kelli Kelly. The three of them took over letting my

other friends know. From there, my

friends and my hoodies took over for me.

Every single one of them knew my love

for Travis. In fact, they all know Travis.

My friends became my support, my lifeline.

I'll never forget that. Ever.

There was so much pain, so much anguish,

so much desperation...just so much that day.

The tears flowed and flowed.

I couldn't even formulate prayers...

but I know God knew my cries. I KNOW HE DID.

We spoke with Lynna off and on

throughout the entire day.

She was experiencing a NIGHTMARE...

desperately trying to get back to Waco,

pleading with me to tell her more about

what was actually going on...

it was a mother's worst nightmare.

And unfortunately it was only the beginning.

I love that I'm recounting this now

six months later. On August 8th,

fourteen days after the accident,

I wrote the following on Caringbridge,

"I hope and pray that in the weeks ahead

we will see more and more of the miracle

and less and less of the nightmare."

Sweet Jesus Above, You have allowed that!

At about two in the afternoon that first day, the nurses told us that the ICU would be closing and nobody would be allowed back in his room until five. This was strict hospital regulations ~ no exceptions. They did allow Scott to stay since the situation was so delicate, but they said nobody else could (not even Aunt Mindy!). I'll never forget my mother sitting in the corner of Trav's room in her Sunday School clothes ~ without even looking up ~ saying,"I'm not leaving this room until my daughter is here." The nurse didn't say a word! Grandmother didn't have to leave.

As word spread to Travis' friends and family friends, the waiting room(s) began to fill up. I remember thinking I'm going to take a couple of pictures for Travis with my cell phone. I think I still thought I'd get to show him those pictures in a couple of days. I couldn't accept what the doctors and nurses were saying.

I look at these pictures and I swear I can feel the depth of the pain that day. It almost overtakes me still to this day. Troy was my ROCK. He let me be...he just knew...he was incredible to me...still has been. This broke his heart, too...seeing me like I was and also because he loves Trav so much.

Michelle and I met Lynna at the door of the hospital when she finally made it. We guided her to his room. By this time, the waiting rooms were packed. Young people were everywhere. God bless Lynna's frail heart...I asked Nurse Heather to begin describing everything to her. I know Travis felt his mother's presence. The depth of Lynna's pain was indescribable.

I stayed until late that night. I took Hunter home with me (after stopping to get him 10 soft tacos at Taco Bell!). My heart hurt so deeply for Hunter. He had no idea what was going on...Happy Go Lucky Hunter. :( Of course I barely slept. I officially got up about five that morning and went to the hospital. There Lynna was in the waiting room clutching to Trav's blood stained shirt. (Strict ICU rules at our hospital will not allow ANYONE from 10 pm until 9 am in the room with an ICU patient...nurses began to secretly let Lynna in during the night in the subsequent days though).

It was unbelievable the amount of people who showed up at the hospital to offer prayers, comfort, food, support...you name it. There were people we didn't even know who came just because they knew Travis from Zeb's and loved him from there! Hudson was everyone's bright spot! :) I hadn't actually realized it just yet, but soon enough I'd realize exactly why God had given us the surprise of Hudson.
God bless all the young people's hearts...we had so much family and so many friends there, that we had to ask them to move into the outer waiting room. They were all so sweet and concerned. I had no idea Travis had so many friends...especially so many beautiful girlfriends! ;) Well, I guess I really did know that. I consider SO MANY of them my very own precious friends now.

I grabbed a framed picture of Travis from my house to set out...I also slept (or tried to anyways)with one right by my bed. I wasn't the only one who thought of bringing pictures...so did Grandmother and Macy. Flowers and food arrived like you wouldn't even believe! Lynna had bought those Superman flip flops (they were huge!) for Travis while she was on the camping trip. Macy and Logan were really the first to get going on the Superman theme. They made posters and bought shirts on the second day. It was such an AWESOME idea! Everyone quickly followed suit...it was like therapy for us to all come together in a way that Travis would love!We had tattoos...we may all end up with Superman tattoos when this is all said and done anyway! Ha! Even Grandmother! ;) Others bought out all the Superman bracelets at Card & Party...The precious, precious young people started making their own bracelets. Sweet Mollie made this one for me ("I love my Trav"). She, Travis, another girl and another boy were supposed to be moving to California for a year long adventure in September. I took Mollie and Britney back to see Travis the first day and the way they spoke to Travis as he lay there was incredible. Wal-Mart was the first place we found that had Superman shirts. By the end of the week, all of the surrounding Wal-Marts were out of Superman shirts! I'm not kidding!!!

The shrine grew and grew for Travis, our Superman!

Either the first or second night, I honestly can't remember...I came home to these beautiful flowers and pictures that the little hoodies had made for me. I also came home to clean laundry, food, happy kids, etc. My neighbors were BEYOND amazing to my entire family and me during this time. The amount of food and drinks and LOVE and PRAYERS they brought to us was seriously unbelievable. Jillian made this one for me and it gave me SO MUCH comfort and hope and peace that week. I will forever treasure this picture. It will be framed for sure. I really did keep God's love in my heart during the worst weeks of my life. Thank you, Sweet Jillian. A seven year old wise beyond her years.Everything was minute by minute, then we reached hour by hour and so on. Finally we reached the 72 hour mark, and the doctors began to think that Travis probably would survive. They just never thought he would wake up. This is truly what we were told. Lynna was beside herself in grief and exhaustion. Scott was the same. My mother was a rock. My dad was so devastated. It's horrible to see your dad cry. The waiting rooms stayed pack. Friends, new and old, to each of us, kept coming and holding us all up. Pastors from SEVERAL churches came continuously to pray over Travis and with us. The young people stayed in the outer waiting room desperate for updates from us. We tried to update them, but I hated telling them what we were really being told. We shared food with them and took great comfort in having them there.Robin brought scrapbook paper and markers for them. It was such a great idea!!!Several times I told those kids that no matter what Trav's outcome was that they must all change their lives as a result of this. Whether he were to walk out of the hospital just fine or never wake up, that we all must change. We all must slow down, make good choices, and cherish every single moment as a gift from God. That was Aunt Mindy's soap box a few times! I meant it for myself, too. :) The young people were amazing and had no idea the true gravity of the situation. When we would say he made it another hour, they took it as he would be okay. They had no idea. Now that I think about it, none of us did.

My sweet, beautiful Macy. She and Travis have always been like brother and sister as well as BEST friends...through their entire lives. They are one year and one month apart in age. Macy hurt so deeply. Guess what happened to the beads that Wal-Mart sells? SOLD OUT!

His guy friends were much more quiet than the girls. I think they were just in shock and didn't quite know how to take it all in. But did any of us really? They were really awesome and always willing to do anything needed like go and check on Trav's house. The students often sat in the hallway of the waiting rooms begging to go down and see Travis.

On day three (I think), Lynna and Scott asked me to come into a meeting with the trauma team, head neurologist (who is a reknowned doctor from Brazil and only at Hillcrest three weeks at a time and had JUST begun his three week stay that weekend!), and head nurses. They needed someone with a little more of a clear head (HA!) and someone who loved Travis as much as they did. I was honored. I told Dr. Cesar during the meeting that we keep hearing stories of hope of people who have had terrible brain injuries and he very politely (really it was) told me to throw those stories out the window that their injuries could NOT be as severe as Travis'. WOW. Since the swelling in Trav's brain was not going down, they were considering a surgery which would have removed the front part of his scull to allow his brain to have room to swell outwardly. I think that was how it would work. It was a VERY risky surgery and trying to decide which way was the right decision was TOUGH to say the least. Not doing it yielded terrible results, doing it yielded terrible results. We decided against the surgery. Thank you LORD...we made the right decision. I love looking back and seeing how God was with us EVERY.SINGLE.STEP.OF.THE.WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Even having this double rainbow appear right around the 72 hour mark outside Trav's room and the waiting room windows!!! Yes, indeed, a sign of God's promise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How AMAZING is that?

My sweet little Walker D! He has always loved Travis so much. He called him Bubba when he first learned to talk. Travis wanted to be called that. Walker made this for Travis at the hospital. Walker was ALL about the superman shirts, bracelets, tattoos, etc. I hope this ordeal will forever be etched in his sweet, young little mind. And that he'll be a much better person for it. Sweet Little Princess Pie didn't know what to think. She became obsessed with making bracelets with the 'big' girls. I know Haddie's little heart hurt. Her and Travis have always been a little smitten with each other. Hadlee is so sensitive and she just couldn't understand. I hate that my children had to see mommy cry so much...more like wail when I was at home in the mornings and would wake up to the reality of our situation. We never allowed Hadlee or Walker to see Travis while in ICU. It would have been too scary. The funny, sweet guy on the right in this picture drove from college in Arkansas straight through when he got the call about Travis that Sunday. Travis has some awesome friends.

These little loves are definitely SUPER BABIES!!! Their innocence, sweetness and enthusiasm brought so much joy to all of us...especially to Lynna and Scott. AND ME!!! :)

We embraced the Superman theme 100%. Old Navy came through with shirts, too!!! What are the odds? We started finding Superman shirts at several places! Kelli G helped so much with my kids that week as did my neighbors. They were all so wonderful to me. I was amazed by my high school friends. Several that I hadn't spoken with in years came to visit, called me, brought food, and prayed for Travis. They ALL remembered him being born when we were in eighth grade. I was the coolest 8th grader EVER since my sister and her husband had a baby and I was an AUNT at thirteen years of age!!! I remember a best friend of mine getting mad at me because she said I devoted too much time and attention to Travis and not my friends anymore! ha! All of those dear childhood/high school friends were amazing coming together to support me. My youth minister came and prayed over Travis. He said, "You used to pretend like Travis was your own baby!" The Na Na's who reside all over the country/world were absolutely amazing, too. They couldn't be by my side but they prayed, they called, they texted, they sent money to Lynna, they had my house cleaned more than once, sent my kids to Build-a-Bear, etc. My rocks from a far! The Hoodies took care of my every need. I can't even fathom all that they did. Sweet Kelli G, well, she cried and hurt with me just like Travis was her very own. She and I had eaten with Travis not too long ago and we are so thankful for that time. I'm only talking about my friends right now. Troy's parents and his extended family were wonderful, the teachers at MHS were wonderful, my parents' friends, my sisters' friends, our extended family, Walker's friends' parents, the PTA at Walker's school, Lynna's work, school friends for Lynna and Michelle, ALL of Lynna's exes! ;), every single church in Waco, STRANGERS...I swear the community came together. It was truly unbelievable. God was so present revealing Himself through the GOODNESS of so many others. I never, ever want to forget that. Walker has ALWAYS reminded us of Travis. His body shape IS Trav's...from his big feet to the size of his legs, his chest, to his full head of hair. Walker may have Troy's looks, but he is totally Travis otherwise. He even walks and runs and dances JUST LIKE TRAVIS. Those first several nights and still to today six months later, I go in at night and rub my hand across Walker's chest and pray for him and his future and also thank God that He saved Travis' life. They remind me so much of each other. A "signature" pose between Travis and Walker...
Logan's sweet heart broke, too. That boy cried so much and so hard every single day. I know that his life is forever changed from this.

Sweet friends, sweet family, sweet cousins...

Several of the young people never grew weary coming up to the hospital and staying all day long. That meant so much to us. Of course my kids made themselves right at home! ;)UNO became quite popular! Those were some long, long days at Hillcrest. We were never without support (or food!). My handsome Hunter B! God bless his heart. He alternated staying at the hospital with Lynna, staying with Michelle and me (still does) and going with his Dad. He remained so upbeat and so positive. He doesn't let on how he feels about everything. He's such a great kid and boy can he eat!!! He was thrilled with whomever would buy him a Starbucks downstairs or pick him up Taco Bell! ;)Scott drove back and forth to Waco every single night and morning. He rarely left Trav's side. He has been a rock for his son. Serving him just like a dad should. I've always loved Scott so much. We all have. I can't ever think of a time when Travis didn't love and brag on his mom and dad. He never went through that "I don't like my parents" stage. Never. Poor Hunter...my kids LOVE having him around!!! Lynna's childhood friend, Alice, was incredible! She coordinated all the food and was at the hospital almost always. She even started making really cool necklaces for us. To this day, six months later, she is still bringing Lynna and Hunter a home cooked meal once a week. Sometimes it was a little overwhelming the amount of people who were there though we never would have changed that. It was just hard to keep talking. Poor Lynna...people wanted around her constantly. You also realize going through something like this that there is nothing like family. My sisters and I practically became one...we've always loved our children like our very own. This proved that 100%. I have spoken to Lynna every single day since July 25th. Usually several times a day. Thankfully we had live entertainment in the form of a four year old and a seven year old!
Lynna rarely left the hospital. So many people came to see her...people she had met at Luby's and other places. That's Lynna...she has never known a stranger. Travis is so much like that, too. She slept every night on the couch in the corner. It was so hard on her. If you have a sister, you know what it's like...I swear Michelle and I could feel her pain. We wished we could have taken more of hers away for her. These are Lynna's closest friends...still standing strong by her side to this day. The Bigham family lives all over...including Michigan. They ALL came! Travis was never short on family support!
Of course we found the TRAVIS Conference Room at the hospital!!! ;) If we saw or found something Superman, we bought it!!!
Sweet, beautiful Alyssa. She had been with Travis before the accident. They had a "special" as in kinda 'talking' relationship. We love her like she is part of our family. She was there from the VERY beginning and has been a HUGE part in Trav's recovery. This young lady is incredibly strong and wise beyond her young years. She and I have become such close friends and I love her dearly!
I so wish I could remember every aspect from those 17 days at the Hillcrest ICU. So much of it is a blurr which I guess is actually a good thing. I had never experienced the depth of pain like that...for myself and for my family. There were a couple of late nights we had to rush back to the hospital because they didn't know if he would make it, times when we were forced out of his room, moments when respitory would have to rush in, moments of great highs and horrible lows, wearing masks and gloves when he had MRSA (staff), absolutely no time for rest, driving back and forth to the hospital, trying to keep up with calls & messages & gifts (which became impossible), and praying CONSTANTLY...or at least trying to formulate prayers. I was having horrible nightmares and Robin encouraged me to open my Bible and seek comfort there. That was some AMAZING advise. I haven't stopped looking to God's word for comfort. Honestly I had never done that before. Every answer you need is in the Bible if you just look. I kept this particular verse (John 16:33) in my purse, in my bathroom, in my kitchen, everywhere and read it so many times those first weeks...

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

This was the long hall way down to Trav's room. Someday I will share pictures of what he looked like laying there. Seriously, it looked like a set for a soap opera because he looked so good. Unfortunately though we watched his right arm begin to curl up (which is normal for a brain injury), his feet drop, his legs get skinny, and his hair GROW (Hunter called him a "Spanish Conquistador" one night and we all about died!). He always had a personal nurse assigned to him who usually sat in a chair outside his room watching him through a window. This picture was taken one morning when they attemped to move Travis to an operating room to insert a feeding tube and trache. Some of the people surrounding him are actually holding a bag above him and breathing for him. Every single breath. The hospital staff was OUTSTANDING to say the least. Unfortunately he was too critical and fragile to move...they quickly had to return him to his room that morning. We were so thankful for the doctors who chose not to risk things that morning. Even turning on the light in his room was too much for the state Travis was in...and we always had to keep very quiet in there.

That particular day of surgery the Hoodies brought pizza and drinks for everyone. One of many times I should say!

Complete with Superman plates and napkins. I love my Hoodies! ;)

We spent a lot of time bonding...with family and with Trav's friends. And making bracelets! ;)

Meet Kenny! He was there with us every single day. I had never known Kenny until all of this. He and Lynna met at a restaurant one night when there weren't any tables left and Lynna and Calvin asked him and his friend if they could join them. That's just the way Lynna rolls! Kenny is like family now. :)))

Love these two...SO MUCH!

Lynna's corner where she slept...

There were so many prayers spoken that week. Often times we would just cry out, other times it was silent. One evening Travis was having a really tough time. Even though he was deep in a coma, he would have trouble breathing on the machine or his body would be going through awful things. We were feeling desperate and distraught. We were up and down the hall and we needed to pray. None of us could bring ourselves together enough. It was close to 9 pm and we knew the ICU doors would be closing soon. Out of nowhere a dear family friend whom we hadn't seen in ages (one of my high school friend's dad) showed up and asked if he could pray? God had sent him that late night for a reason. We joined hands in the waiting room and he said the most beautiful, perfect prayer. I so wish I could remember the words Mr. Litton said that night. He started out by saying, "Well, God here we are..." and everything that followed was just perfect. God was always so present. Ministers from my mother's church came and annoited Travis. The pastor from my church prayed over Travis one day and spoke
rather loudly. Travis moved when Pastor Toby spoke ...again...
I don't think that was reflex!!!

You could ALWAYS feel
God's presence in the room with Travis.
I will forever wonder if Travis was truly
in God's presence? We often thought and hoped
that Travis was in an intimate conversation
with God. That brought us such comfort to
think that. I pray that someday
TRAVIS will be able to tell us if he was.

Sometimes we even laughed...especially at Hunter B! Or late at night when my sisters and me would be huddled up in Trav's room joking about the cute doctors or who would play each of us in the movie about the miracle of Travis (in case you're wondering...Julia Roberts for me, Sandra Bullock for Lynna and Angelina Jolie for Michelle!!!!!!!!) Thankfully, this little Baby Love always gave
us something to smile about even when the tears couldn't stop flowing. :) Just a little bit of Superman BLING BLING! ha!
One of my bracelets says, "Livin' the Dream".
It's a famous Travis Bigham saying!

That's the necklace that Alice made...

I love all three of my nephews so very, very much!

Anyone who knew me when Travis was born knew that I desperately wanted a girl! It literally took SECONDS for that to change when Scott walked out holding him. I FELL IN LOVE...he even had a little cone head. I was thirteen years old and in my head I thought, "I still love him even with a conehead." I had no idea that the cone head would be gone within the hour! Travis was my first little love...he was my sidekick, my baby doll, my sleep partner when they were at home...then he grew to be my son, my brother, my student, and my friend. I knew after having Travis (and Hunter and Logan) that I HAD to have boys!!!I'm so proud of Hunter & Logan...especially for the way they have handled themselves throughout all of this. I can't forget my beautiful niece either...she even let me be her Facebook friend through all of this! ;)

There are so many things I am leaving out about

those first weeks in the ICU at Hillcrest.

Some things I am choosing to forget and then other

things I never, ever want to forget.

I vividly remember that nice nurse telling me

that awful morning that Travis' brain stem was

severely damaged...after seeing what must

have been confusion on my face, she quietly

whispered, "It controls everything."

A Miracle Today.

Another nurse days later told me that the

best way to explain his injuries was that it

was like 'shaken baby syndrome'. There was

not a particular spot...it was damaged all over.

A Miracle Today.

A friend of mine who works for a Hillcrest

doctor had him to pull up Trav's cat scans

a few days after the accident.

She told me that the doctor said

there "couldn't be any hope. his brain is mush."

A Miracle Today.

Travis still has an incredibly long way to go,

but WOW...it's unbelievable to watch a

miracle happen right before your very eyes.

God has been SO GOOD to my family and me

during the most difficult days of our lives.

We still cry almost every day

in some form or fashion...

for Travis, for Lynna, for my parents,

for all the what if's, for the way

that NOTHING seems quite right

no matter where we are or what we are doing...

but God has been/is carrying us through.

He has shown himself through his healing

powers and through the absolute

goodness of people.

Of course I would give anything to go

back and change what happened,

but I can't. Instead, like I said from the very

beginning, we must just embrace it.

I thought that first day that my family

would completely and totally fall apart

(& there are still plenty of days I feel like we are),

but we haven't.

We are stronger and closer than EVER.

Each of us loves our Superman

so very, very much.

We cling to him while we cling to Jesus...

I never knew what it truly felt like
to have a broken heart until that day...

in that instant.
Travis has always been my first love.
At such an early age, I was fortunate
enough to experience that unconditional
motherly type love.

No matter how Travis ends up,

I will be with him, supporting him,

caring for him, loving him

and thanking God for him.

My best friend's mother sent me a journal

shortly after the accident,

the entry for JULY 25TH is taken from

John, Romans, and Jeremiah...

"You can find Me not only in beauty and

birdcalls, but also in tragedy

and faces filled with grief.

I can take the deepest sorrow

and weave it into a pattern for good."

Thank you, Sweet Jesus, for the

miracle of my nephew, Travis.

And thank you for all the "good"

we have seen and continue to see

out of this difficult, difficult time.

www.caringbridge.org/visit/travisbigham